A New Year... A New Me

I had left my ways of blogging (not that I had been doing it for too long) because there were too many reasons to count.  But the biggest reason, and the reason that I can not ignore was I was not committed.  

We had a "saint's and sinner's" party for new years at my house.  It was great, but I have to tell you - it was frustrating to see the pictures today.  I was little red riding hood, in a dress that I thought was totally hot - but it turns out, I was NOT.  I honestly looked like a beached whale.  So today - as I look at all of my New Years resolutions (which I like to call my "yearly to do list" instead) it is to keep blogging no matter what.  Each year I make this long long list, but I just dont feel it is fair to myself to do that.  In many ways, it is setting myself up for failure.  So here is my shorter lists of things to do this year:

1.  Work out at least 1x per week

2.  Create a Will with my Hubby

3.  Clean our house every 2 weeks

4.  Plan an outing with friends 2x a month - and KEEP those plans

5.  Find a full time teaching job

6.  Do bills as a team with my husband (as he is the one who is currently doing them)

I think the workout one is the most important.  I belong to Jazzercise, I have been a member for a month and a half, but have only gone twice, and that includes my first day.  I am going to work to go at least once a week - and also walk on the treadmill or workout here at home.  I know it is crazy, but I am having a really hard time getting motivated.  I keep thinking that I need to go back to Weight Watchers, but if I keep doing Weight Watchers, then I will only know how to handle my eating by counting my points.  I have a big problem with that.

Weight Watchers is a FABULOUS program, and I took part of their program for 2 1/2 years, but it is time for me to figure out how to do stuff on my own, and how to count calories, and figure my workouts into it.  

SO. As of tomorrow.  I am going to measure and weigh myself again.  I will be writing everything down that I put in my mouth, and I will not hide what I am eating.

That is a big problem that I have.  I hide my food.  I know I am a big girl, and I am ashamed of the way I look and the way that I feel.  I will work on changing that, and being good to me.  I am starting also by getting massages and going to the chiropractor on a regular basis.  I think this is important to me and my body - and my life - and my husband.  

I need to love me. 

That is a big order to fill.  If anyone out there has any ideas on how to love me, please let me know.  :)  In the meantime - I am working on me, and will see you tomorrow.